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nocturnal

sky turns from navy

to an electric blue

broken by an orb of pink

growing slowly

over the Mississippi

A time not seen by many

when the day seems to slow

then speed up again

A man rides alone on his bicycle

weighed down by goods

from the corner 24 hour mart

a spider spins her web

invisibly in the corner of my porch

the air weighs heavy

alluding to the heat to come

a rare silence lulls over

the normally bustling street

broken only by the first birds chirping

and a siren perhaps miles away

as the world wakes up

i drink my tea to relax

smoke the last cigarette of the day

unable to sleep when the world is dark

finally able to lie down and let go

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Tonights Cocktail: The Gin Fizz

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1.5 oz london dry gin (I used Tanqueray)

1 oz fresh lemon juice

.75 oz simple syrup

egg white

shake ingredients in a mixing tin with a little bit of ice

splash a little club soda in the bottom of your glass (DON’T SHAKE WITH THE REST OF THE DRINK. or do, it’ll be hilarious

strain into a highball over ice or a martini glass like I did. The former is the traditional way to prepare this classic cocktail.

Garnish with a lemon twist

The person I made this for tonight was someone who wanted a unique martini that wasn’t too sweet. I think that this was a good choice. The guys who order them come in about once a week to have a few of my Shipwrecks or Irish Trashcans. These are the type guys who have ordered a drink by saying “I don’t know surprise me” So after pulling 100 different drinks out of my ass they finally found 3 or 4 that they drink usually in the same order every Thursday. These guys are college kids, I think they turned 21 recently. They talk about playing golf and smoking weed. Total fratbros, but pretty entertaining nonetheless.

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Finally moved!

We’re finally moved into our new place. This whole last weekend up until today has been me running around packing stuff, moving things, changing our address for everything, and also listening to and supporting my boyfriend who was initially excited about this place but due to some electrical issues he is less so.  None of the upstairs outlets are grounded so it is pretty unsafe, especially since he has a gaming pc and is touchy about it. We have a nice big backyard with a firepit which makes Tiki happy. We also just got our internet hooked up.

A good thing about this place is that I can finally start on some crafts and things. I have some vinyls that I would like to hang up, and we would also like to install shelving.

I’m sad because I’m not sure exactly how I’m going to go about making candles anymore, as we don’t have a gas stove anymore and that was way nicer.

Nothing really interesting in this blog post, just a little update on my life. I wish that they prescribed xanax for moving. That would be really nice haha.

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So peeved right now

Sarah and I in 2004 when I was 14 and she was 11. Notice the ironic tshirts
Sarah and I in 2004 when I was 14 and she was 11. Notice the ironic tshirts

I don’t even know what to say. Today I found out that my younger sister is pregnant. This drives me crazy on so many levels. She currently doesn’t have the internet so I’m not really worried about her seeing this, and this is my personal blog and it’s just how I feel. Sarah has been dating this guy for about a year now. His name is Jeffery and I can’t stand him. Since she has met him she has made every mistake possible.

The first thing that happened almost immediately after they started dating, if noticed that he never left her house and he didn’t have a car or a job. The only reason that this affected me at all is because I had dated a guy like this about two years earlier, to a guy named Richard who never had a job or a car (or even his license, which I later found out that Jeffery also had suspended) and throughout the breakup Sarah was around and saw how bad Richard treated me, and how he moved into my house and started manipulating and leeching off of me until I couldn’t take it anymore.

The next thing that happened is that two months after they started dating, Jeffery found out he had a kid. In Ohio, three states away. Oh, and the kid is three, nobody told Jeffery about it. So he decided that he was going to move all the way over there to be with this child he had never met. The child is undoubtable his, he looks just like him. Jeffery does have some strong genes. Sarah decided to follow him, quitting her job that she has had for two years that she was just recently promoted at, taking her car that she had just recently gotten and was supposed to be making payment on. She also left her nice one bedroom apartment that was all hers for the first time in her life.

You see, Sarah is my half-sister and she was…passed around a lot between her father and mother and later, when our mom went to prison she spent the school week with our grandma so that she could go to private Catholic school where she needed to be driven. This was where I saw her on Friday nights while our mother was away. Our grandma is a very strict lady as she used to be a school teacher and a therapist for children so she has seen some shit. She also thinks that she knows everything about everything. Currently her health is declining and I haven’t seen her in a while. She spends all day on her couch watching Fox News and living in imaginary anger. She is literally angry about everything. My other grandma is nothing like her. Our grandma is so strict that she made Sarah go to bed at 9pm every night and always checked over all of her homework. At the time, Sarah was living rebelliously at her dad’s house on Saturdays and Sundays. She came out online as a lesbian and even got a girlfriend. Our grandma found out about it and was furious. Sarah moved back to her dad’s house at the beginning of 8th grade, and went back to public school. Our grandma was so angry at Sarah that Sarah tried to kill herself by taking a lot of pills. At the time, Sarah was a bit of a hypochondriac so she had a lot of random pills around the house. This was one of the most painful times of my life. I felt like I had really helped take care of Sarah when our mother was asleep during the day or wasted at night. I felt really betrayed that she didn’t talk to me about what was going on in her head and that she felt the inclination to off herself. After this I forgave her but I almost didn’t trust her. Which means that when she did it again, I became angry and we didn’t speak for over a year. Sarah dropped out of high school on her 16th birthday but got her GED immediately without even taking the class.

Before Sarah went to Ohio Jeffery proposed to her. This was weird to me because they had been dating about three months at this point. After she went to Ohio, she couldn’t find another job and they got kicked out of the place they were living. There was no real explanation for why they got kicked out. They were supposed to be living with his ailing father helping to take care of him. They were homeless for a time and eventually they came back without any money to their name and without a place to go here in town. Since our grandpa owns apartments, he set her up with a different one bedroom apartment and somehow she got her job back at Ruby Tuesday. Jeffery still doesn’t have a job or his license but he was driving around Sarah’s car that our grandparents bought her. Jeffery got a job but was fired, then got another job. In his first week at the new job he wreaked her car and lost that job too. Sarah was working as a delivery driver at pizza hut so she couldn’t do that anymore until she had a car again. She hasn’t had a job in about four months at this point. She has lost her apartment and I thought that she and Jeffery had broken up. She actually told me they did break up, but he never left her apartment, and he wasn’t paying rent. I guess they got back together, but our grandpa officially kicked her out at the end of this last month. He even got the sheriff to kick her out. Yes, this is the kind of thing that our grandparents do. They have all of this money but they royally screw Sarah all the time. In their defense, Sarah is a huge bitch to them, but that is really just her personality. She isn’t so much of a huge bitch as she is abrasive and unreliable.

So now she is going to have a kid and I’m genuinely worried about it. This kid is going to be my little niece or nephew and they are going to start their life out in a tough spot. Sarah is extremely pro-life (the opposite of me). I doubt that she will do the smart thing and give it up for adoption. I just knew she would do something like this. She has never been very good at making choices for herself.

So yeah, that’s what is going on in my life right now. John and I found a really nice house that we are going to be moving into in two weeks. When Sarah told me she was pregnant I just said “oh…that sucks” because I’m an insensitive bitch sometimes.

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le petit blog post

Today was fun. I finally got my computer back. Turns out they tried to call me on the first day that I gave it to them but they had the wrong phone number (even though I gave them my new one.) There were just a few screws missing, however that happens. John and I watched the Anime movie Graves of the Fireflies, which is really sad and really good. 

It was about a boy who is taking care of his younger sister after both of their parents die. It is set in WWII Japan. They become homeless and he is forced to grow up a lot. For a movie made in 1988, it is really well animated and stood the test of time. I may have even shed a little tear.

I am in the process of creating a whiskey tasting sheet, as we are going to start doing irish whiskey flights at work. Despite the fact that I know little and less about whiskey, I’m trying really hard here, and its very time consuming. Obviously I’m cheating by using a website.

Today marks the fourth day I have known my roommates girlfriend, and the second time she has spent the night at our house. I have yet to see or hear her use the restroom. Its not like I’m keeping tabs on her or anything, its just weird since I pee all the time. I am beginning to think she might be a vampire who has no need to eat or drink therefor she wouldn’t use the bathroom. I’m not sure.

Phil, John, and I looked at an adorable little house in our hometown this afternoon. Hopefully we get to rent it as it is getting down to the wire and I’m getting really nervous that we aren’t going to find a place, as the last house hasn’t called us back yet.

It rained most of the day, and we even had a tornado warning. All of the sirens in Cape went off, although the sky didn’t look bad and I don’t think there was ever actually a tornado. They were just a little trigger happy with the siren.

Anyway, this is just a short blog post before I go to bed.