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So peeved right now

Sarah and I in 2004 when I was 14 and she was 11. Notice the ironic tshirts
Sarah and I in 2004 when I was 14 and she was 11. Notice the ironic tshirts

I don’t even know what to say. Today I found out that my younger sister is pregnant. This drives me crazy on so many levels. She currently doesn’t have the internet so I’m not really worried about her seeing this, and this is my personal blog and it’s just how I feel. Sarah has been dating this guy for about a year now. His name is Jeffery and I can’t stand him. Since she has met him she has made every mistake possible.

The first thing that happened almost immediately after they started dating, if noticed that he never left her house and he didn’t have a car or a job. The only reason that this affected me at all is because I had dated a guy like this about two years earlier, to a guy named Richard who never had a job or a car (or even his license, which I later found out that Jeffery also had suspended) and throughout the breakup Sarah was around and saw how bad Richard treated me, and how he moved into my house and started manipulating and leeching off of me until I couldn’t take it anymore.

The next thing that happened is that two months after they started dating, Jeffery found out he had a kid. In Ohio, three states away. Oh, and the kid is three, nobody told Jeffery about it. So he decided that he was going to move all the way over there to be with this child he had never met. The child is undoubtable his, he looks just like him. Jeffery does have some strong genes. Sarah decided to follow him, quitting her job that she has had for two years that she was just recently promoted at, taking her car that she had just recently gotten and was supposed to be making payment on. She also left her nice one bedroom apartment that was all hers for the first time in her life.

You see, Sarah is my half-sister and she was…passed around a lot between her father and mother and later, when our mom went to prison she spent the school week with our grandma so that she could go to private Catholic school where she needed to be driven. This was where I saw her on Friday nights while our mother was away. Our grandma is a very strict lady as she used to be a school teacher and a therapist for children so she has seen some shit. She also thinks that she knows everything about everything. Currently her health is declining and I haven’t seen her in a while. She spends all day on her couch watching Fox News and living in imaginary anger. She is literally angry about everything. My other grandma is nothing like her. Our grandma is so strict that she made Sarah go to bed at 9pm every night and always checked over all of her homework. At the time, Sarah was living rebelliously at her dad’s house on Saturdays and Sundays. She came out online as a lesbian and even got a girlfriend. Our grandma found out about it and was furious. Sarah moved back to her dad’s house at the beginning of 8th grade, and went back to public school. Our grandma was so angry at Sarah that Sarah tried to kill herself by taking a lot of pills. At the time, Sarah was a bit of a hypochondriac so she had a lot of random pills around the house. This was one of the most painful times of my life. I felt like I had really helped take care of Sarah when our mother was asleep during the day or wasted at night. I felt really betrayed that she didn’t talk to me about what was going on in her head and that she felt the inclination to off herself. After this I forgave her but I almost didn’t trust her. Which means that when she did it again, I became angry and we didn’t speak for over a year. Sarah dropped out of high school on her 16th birthday but got her GED immediately without even taking the class.

Before Sarah went to Ohio Jeffery proposed to her. This was weird to me because they had been dating about three months at this point. After she went to Ohio, she couldn’t find another job and they got kicked out of the place they were living. There was no real explanation for why they got kicked out. They were supposed to be living with his ailing father helping to take care of him. They were homeless for a time and eventually they came back without any money to their name and without a place to go here in town. Since our grandpa owns apartments, he set her up with a different one bedroom apartment and somehow she got her job back at Ruby Tuesday. Jeffery still doesn’t have a job or his license but he was driving around Sarah’s car that our grandparents bought her. Jeffery got a job but was fired, then got another job. In his first week at the new job he wreaked her car and lost that job too. Sarah was working as a delivery driver at pizza hut so she couldn’t do that anymore until she had a car again. She hasn’t had a job in about four months at this point. She has lost her apartment and I thought that she and Jeffery had broken up. She actually told me they did break up, but he never left her apartment, and he wasn’t paying rent. I guess they got back together, but our grandpa officially kicked her out at the end of this last month. He even got the sheriff to kick her out. Yes, this is the kind of thing that our grandparents do. They have all of this money but they royally screw Sarah all the time. In their defense, Sarah is a huge bitch to them, but that is really just her personality. She isn’t so much of a huge bitch as she is abrasive and unreliable.

So now she is going to have a kid and I’m genuinely worried about it. This kid is going to be my little niece or nephew and they are going to start their life out in a tough spot. Sarah is extremely pro-life (the opposite of me). I doubt that she will do the smart thing and give it up for adoption. I just knew she would do something like this. She has never been very good at making choices for herself.

So yeah, that’s what is going on in my life right now. John and I found a really nice house that we are going to be moving into in two weeks. When Sarah told me she was pregnant I just said “oh…that sucks” because I’m an insensitive bitch sometimes.